Okay, so I promised you all the good details and here they are.
There had still been no indication that we were anywhere close to Cora’s appearance – no Braxton Hicks contractions, no major dilation, etc. I was even swimming laps the day before she came. However, I woke up at 8am on Wednesday – my actual due date, who knew? – rolled over to set my alarm to snooze for 10 more minutes, and felt a little gush (sorry, but I said there would be “details”). After a few more of those, I was pretty sure what was happening, but all the books and classes say that you’ll probably have contractions and other signs first (and may even need to have your water broken for you) and that it’s only on television where a woman suddenly realizes she’s having a baby because her water breaks all over the place. Mine wasn’t all over the place, thankfully, but it was the first and only indication of labor.
Since it was my due date, though, I already had an appointment at 10 am with my OB. She checked and said, “Oh yeah, we call that “grossly ruptured,” plus you’re 50% effaced and her head is way down.” So, given all that, she sent me straight over to Labor and Delivery to check in (usually you go through a triage screening, but she had us go straight to L&D). I still hadn’t started contractions, which is pretty crazy, since doctors sometime break your bag of waters to accelerate labor, so they agreed to have me on the monitor for 15 minutes at a time (to make sure Cora was doing well and that I was too) and then walking around for 45 minutes to try to kickstart labor.
This is me during that time – pretty relaxed, right??
By 3 pm – 7 hours after my water broke – I still hadn’t started real contractions, so they insisted on putting me on a pitocin drip. I was pretty disappointed, because pitocin tends to make labor harder and faster, throwing you into strong labor, as opposed to giving your body time to “warm up,” so to speak, to the contractions as they strengthen on their own. I was really wanting to go without an epidural as long as possible, so I was afraid this would be a setback.
In all honesty, I wanted to go without any epidural or pain meds at all, but I hadn’t really said that out loud, because I never wanted to regret my birth experience or to feel disappointed in myself. At any rate, they started me off at a level 6 drip, and by 7:30 pm, when I was just getting into a regular labor pattern, I was up to a level 56 drip, which they kept me on throughout the whole rest of the delivery!!
Things got pretty serious, pretty quickly from that point on. My contractions were really strong and getting really close together. Getting to the bathroom between contractions became impossible, and at one point, the nurse wasn’t able to check me for dilation because there wasn’t time to roll over and get checked before the next one came!
During all this, I was trying to do what all the books I’d been reading and all my yoga training had told me. They all said that the best thing you can do is relax and not fight against what your body is doing. Your body knows what needs to be done, and if you work against what your body is doing naturally, you’re going to make it harder on yourself. Great in theory, right? Have you ever tried to relax while your insides are convulsing? Not to mention that the truckload of pitocin I had in me was causing my body to shake involuntarily at times.
However, during all of this, Coleman was a labor champ. He was encouraging and supportive and tried to help in every way he could. He talked me through every contraction, reminding me to slow my breathing and to focus. He also did a great job not laughing at all the nutty sounds I was making. Apparently the sphincter in your throat and jaw area is linked to the sphincter involved in birthing, and clenching one makes the other less able to relax, which is the opposite of what you want to be happening down there! You want it to open up and allow the baby to come on out! All that to say, I was trying to keep my throat and jaw relaxed, which, early on, was able to be accomplished by less serious noises, but by the end sounded a whole lot like growling. My throat was sore for awhile after birth from all that primal stuff!
When I was so tired from being unable to relax between contractions that were coming too close together, I seriously contemplated an epidural or something to calm me down so that I wouldn’t fight against what my body needed to do. But every time, Coleman told me that he knew I could do it, that I was doing it, and that I could keep doing it. He pushed me without making me feel bad or making me angry. Pretty awesome, right??
The nurse that came on right at the end was also stunning. I just remember that she kept saying, “You are amazing. Almost no one around here goes without an epidural and really no one does it on this much pitocin. You are amazing me here.” I can’t tell you how powerful positive reinforcement was at that moment. I really need to send that woman some flowers. She rocked.
I’ll try to wrap this up soon, I promise! I’m just trying to get all the details out so I can remember them.
So I’m only at 7 centimeters at this point, and it’s getting pretty crazy. They called my doctor to come in, and I was trying to figure out how I was going to keep this up. I did for a little while, but all of a sudden, the contractions started changing and it was all I could do not to push. In fact, this was when I thought I would need drugs for sure because I was becoming completely unable to keep from pushing, and if I couldn’t fight that, they would have to give me something to relax me. Since things were speeding up, the nurse called the resident on call and put her on standby. However, as my need to push got more desperate, my nurse said she thought she better check me again. She was shocked to find that I had rocketed from 7 to 10 centimeters and said, “Yeah, you’re at 10 and that’s a head, so you go ahead and start pushing!” She called the resident right back and said to forget standby and get down there now.
She made it pretty fast and got everything set up when my OB finally walked in. She hadn’t been in a big hurry since I’d only been at 7, and nearly missed the birth altogether! However, she was there for all the pushing and was pretty fantastic.
After a couple of different positions, I found a good one to push in and things happened really fast from there on out. I know some of you might think I’m crazy, but they got the mirror out and I was able to see everything as Cora came out to meet us.
It was truly amazing, and I honestly can’t find the words to tell you about it. It was the most beautiful, most miraculous moment of my life. This picture is a combo of that feeling and a visual representation of how far I’d come from the nice, happy picture above.
So I had my natural childbirth after all, and though I would normally be loathe to brag about myself, I have to admit that I'm pretty darn proud of that. I wasn't sure I could do it, but I feel kind of like a champ. The only bad news is that they had me pushing pretty hard to keep her from scootching back up in between contractions, so I did tear and have to have stitches. Sad. And very sore.
Other than that, though, I have to say that even by later on that day, all the bad things and the pain had gotten a little fuzzy and I have only happy memories of the whole experience. In fact, as I was lying down for my nap today, I found myself smiling just thinking about it all. The human mind is pretty amazing, isn’t it? Not to mention the human body…
The only other mini-regret I have is that she arrived just 10 minutes too late to share her Great-granddad’s 80th birthday (June 24th, her due date). I even asked a few minutes before midnight “exactly how fudgeable this whole date thing” was. The nurse laughed, but my OB said that since it’s now all computerized, it’s pretty much illegal. However, my Grandmother said they’d celebrate it on Texas time, so we fixed that one! I think I mentioned this in the other post, but my brain is a little mushy these days...blame it on the sleep deprivation!
Okay, so that’s everything you couldn’t possibly want to know about our labor and delivery. Some of you had asked, so there you have it. For the rest of you, I’d apologize for the length of the post, but you probably stopped reading long ago, so we’re all good.
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